If you are someone who has just learned that a close family member or friend has Alzheimer’s disease you may be overwhelmed. You are suffering the gradual loss of a loved one as well as giving up the dreams you had for the rest of your life together. This is painful and unpleasant. You may find yourself retreating as your minds races and your emotions swirl around you. You may begin to experience grief but feel you must hide it. That presents a fine balancing act of taking care of your loved one and taking care of yourself. This is all normal.
You have entered into grief. Many in the field of mental health state there are stages of grief. Everyone does not go through all of the stages or in any particular order. I found myself cycling and bouncing around.
The 5 stages most list are :
- denial
- anger
- bargaining
- depression
- acceptance
In stage one we don’t want to believe the diagnosis. We pull away and isolate ourselves to process the thoughts. Take your time. You will need a support network. Before you start building it though, realize that they will not understand that you don’t even know what help you will need yet. At first, you will just need their prayers and arms to hold you as you cry.
An earthquake has just rattled your world. Aftershocks will occur in the coming days so don’t be surprised. The shocks will soon be felt by your family, neighbors and friends. I held on tightly to my faith and God helped me work through the hardest days. He will do the same for you. As time passes you will discover you are stronger than you ever thought you could be.
Alzheimer’s has been described as the long goodbye. You will need to allow yourself to grieve the small losses along the way, This helps you to focus on making the most of what you still have left. Tears will fall but moments of happiness can still occur. Learning to relax and ride the waves, rather than fighting them, makes it easier.
At a later date I will address the other steps of grief. In parting, know that life has changed but your love for each other has not. Love can override fear, anxiety, and hopelessness.
Word for Today
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans 12:12
Song for Today
Prayer for Today
Dear God,
I come today wracked by pain and brokenness. I simply cannot do this alone. I need you to hold me. I need you to give me hope as I work through the news I have received. My words and thoughts are so scattered so most of my prayer will be tears and groaning.
I know you understand. I place my trust in you.
Amen
Walking Them Home 